It was a breezy afternoon. School had just finished. I raced to get the weather machine. Then I saw my brother right where I hid the weather machine. I took no time in running over there. We both grabbed it at the same time.

“Let go!” I told him.

“Never,” he said back.

So I yanked at the weather machine and got hold of the whole thing and I ran, my brother on my tail. Then my brother pushed me and I flew to the floor. My brother quickly caught it before it hit the ground and ran off. I quickly got up and ran after my brother.

I caught up to him and pushed him. Then I yelled, “That’s what you get.” But I forgot to catch the weather machine then I heard a big CRASH!

I turned around and saw pieces of the weather machine scattered everywhere.

“What did you do?” my brother yelled at me.”

“I didn’t mean to,” I said back.

That was the end of the weather machine.

Ding! Dong! Ding! Dong!

1. Naomid Says:
   May 5th, 2008 at 3:34 pm

   I think you need to add more and use more writing tools. I like the way you used dialoge though. By the way if it was the end of the machine,who rang the door bell? :*)

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2. stepheni Says:
   May 5th, 2008 at 3:36 pm

   I like how you made sequels. Are you going to make another diferent sequel?

   [Reply]

3. criss Says:
   May 7th, 2008 at 10:34 am

   Stephen, I might make another sequel, but first I have to come up with a sequel!

   [Reply]